Tips to enjoy the holidays

Dec. 09--BLOOMINGTON -- Enjoying the holidays with a mental illness is possible but it takes effort.

What follows is advice to help people with mental illness and their loved ones. Thanks to Dr. Asifa Choudhry, psychiatrist with Advocate Medical Group Behavioral Health; Steve DeCremer, clinical coordinator of the outpatient program at the Center for Human Services; and Elizabeth Hall, community liaison for NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) of Livingston/McLean Counties for their thoughts.

For people with mental illness

Know that you are not alone

About 16 percent of Americans suffer from major depressive disorder at some time in their lives, according to the National Comorbidity Study. About 4 to 16 percent of the population has an anxiety disorder. Some of those people -- and others -- have bipolar disorder.

Stay compliant with your meds, counseling

Make sure you have enough medication to get through the holidays and take them as prescribed. Continue to go to your counseling and support group sessions, no matter how busy you are during the holidays.

Stick to your daily routine

Changes in routine can increase anxiety, so routine should be maintained as much as possible throughout the holidays.

Engage in good self care

Get enough sleep and maintain healthy eating. Avoid alcohol, which can interact with your meds and bring you down.

Exercise and engage in a creative activity. The boost in endorphins will help.

"Make an extra effort to seek out joy and humor," DeCremer said. That could be watching a funny movie, listening to music or going for a walk.

Set reasonable expectations

Make a realistic to-do list and get those things done. You'll keep your body and mind active and you'll feel better. But don't overextend yourself physically, emotionally or financially.

Plan ahead

If you become anxious in large crowds, take a friend or family member with you when you go Christmas shopping or when you go to that holiday gathering. You will have someone to support you -- and to help you to leave -- if you become anxious.

"It's OK to excuse yourself to take a break," Choudhry said.

Schedule time for those extra holiday activities. Then schedule time to recover from them, DeCremer said.

Spend time with supportive people/accept differences

Be yourself. If there are conflicts within your family, accept those differences and try to set them aside during the holiday gathering.

If you think a relative will annoy you, avoid him or her or practice what you will say if they try to get under your skin. A support person can help. If conflict happens, it's OK to leave.

Start new traditions

If old family traditions no longer speak to you or you can't participate in them, start a new tradition.

For family members and friends

Be understanding

"People say 'Why can't he just pull himself together?' It's their brain. It has to be horrible," said Hall, who has a brother and daughter with a mental illness.

"In one moment, they are lucid. In the next moment, they are not. You wouldn't tell someone with cancer or diabetes to pull themselves out of it. Don't judge them too harshly."

Extend the invitation

Include a loved one with a mental illness in your holiday plans and activities. Invite them. If they accept, ask them whether they want support during the event. Do so if they say yes. If they decline to go, accept their decision.

If they will join your activity if you go at a different time or don't stay as long, consider making those changes.

Know the warning signs

If a person has increased worry and restlessness, is easily fatigued and irritated and has difficulty focusing and sleeping, they may be experiencing anxiety. If they need to get outside and are experiencing air hunger, increased heart rate and chest pain, they may be experiencing panic disorder. If they are sad and negative, are no longer interested in activities formerly enjoyed, experience significant weight gain or loss, have difficulty sleeping and decreased energy, they may be experiencing depression.

Ask the person if they'd like to talk. Listen without judgment. Ask how you can help. Ask if they'd like to see a counselor, psychiatrist or their primary care physician. Offer to accompany them.

Help is available

If a person needs immediate assistance, help is available from PATH (Call 211 or 309-828-1022); Center for Human Service (309-827-5351); National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-273-8255); and NAMI Livingston/McLean (309-287-9913 or www.NamiLivingstonMclean.org).

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